ChezanoRakuen

I did the smart stupid thing of starting "Reply 1997" not too long ago. Marathoned the episodes that was out and got hit with so many feels that I didn't quite know what to do. To avoid the need to crawl under my covers and hold my pillow in sadness and every other emotion under the sun, I started keeping my sketchbook next to me every time I watched another episode (mainly for the sadness).

So that, immediately after it was over... I would get myself together as much as possible.

Slid my sketchbook in front of me

Grab the pencil connected to it

And drew as much of my sorrow away as I could.

A few of these pictures ended up being JunHee & YunJae related… Like 6 of them. (Which this is a lot of drawing for me. I don't think I ever picked up my sketch book this much in a such short period of time)

I might post them later. Still debating that. And if I do, know that they're still sketchy cause that's just how I draw things~

And this has been my random fyi of the day

(And figured maybe dA peeps would appreciate this. Cross posted on my tumblr and LJ because it's Laruku and I can)



I went through so many different emotions just within that 2 hour concert, that it's ridiculous. I've been a fan of Laruku for 7 years or so. I love them. They're always a group that I will forever love~

I actually didn't think I would be able to go to this show as I'm pretty low on funds, but through some awesome friends and communication, I landed a ticket literally a couple hours before the show and only physically had the ticket in my hand, 30 minutes before the concert was supposed to start.

At first I just thought that I would be fine if I missed it because I've seen HYDE twice in person. Once at Otakon 2009 and the other during a VAMPS concert here in the city. My reasoning was: I saw him preform. It'll be practically the same thing.

But upon finding out that I was officially going to the concert. The whole train ride there I was a nervous internally antsy wreck. (I even managed to drop my phone... I haven't dropped my phone since I first got it) Sitting through that show and seeing not only HYDE, but Yukihiro, Tetsu and Ken on the stage just proved that... Nope. This is nothing like seeing VAMPS. The two groups may have the same lead singer but god knows it's two completely different things and feelings.

They performed a good list of new songs and pulled out a few classics like "Honey", "Caress of Venus", "Stay Away", "Ready Steady Go", "Revelation", my all time favorite song in the world "Forbidden Lover" (which I legit started crying over once I heard the first couple of seconds of the song) and few others and then they ended it with "Niji". And it was just... Absolutely perfect.

I didn't even care that I was sitting in a section whose view was being on and off blocked by the camera or that I was sitting in front of a group of people who possibly only came to the concert because their sensei gave them tickets to see the show (and one of the guy's admitted to only knowing "Ready Steady Go" in a conversation</i>) or the fact that my camera decided it didn't want to take awesome pictures anymore.

No, nothing else even mattered because this is Laruku. Where HYDE is amazingly charismatic and sings with a voice like no other. Where Tetsu is positively ridiculous and plays riffs on his hot pink guitar like nobody's business. Where Ken is unbelievably adorable and lit up the whole arena in just that one moment. And Where Yukihiro hypes up a crowd simply by just sitting behind his drum set the whole concert and never saying a word (with his Monopoly haha)



This was L'arc~en~Ciel. And this was purely amazing.

Here's to hoping they come back again~

Happy 20th Anniversary Guys.


Glad you Finally made it to NYC.


We love you here ♥

(Also I showed my mom the Laruku poster I got and told them how old they are... and she was in complete denial, cause noway is that possible when they look in their 20's~)

Tagged by my amazing and always gorgeous Toh-chan badtouchking

1->You must post these rules.
2->Each person must post 10 things about themselves on their journal.
3->Answer the questions the tagger set for you in their post, and create ten new questions for the people you tag to answer.
4->You have to choose 10 people to tag and post their icons on your journal.
5->Go to their pages and tell them you have tagged her/him.
6->No tag backs.
7->No saying "you are tagged if you've reading this." You legitimately have to tag 10 people.
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Ten Facts About Me:

My memory can be the absolute worse a lot of times. I'll set out to do something, put it on temporary hold while I do something else... won't get back to whatever it is till months later. Legit.

I used to be in a choir back when I was in middle school/junior high. Because of them, I realized how much much I really want to sing and perform. They are the reason my voice even sounds semi-good.

I have a terrible case of stage fright. Which might officially be on it's way out the door after years of making myself sing in certain settings, karaoke sessions with friends and Glee. ( Glee and mostly: The Warblers... there's more than 1 reason why I love them.)

I auditioned for the Glee Project ( at the last minute. Was literally only there as support for my friends ended up getting talked into going for it.) I didn't make it but I did pretty darn good if I must say so myself considering my fears. So...Proudest moment to date.

I have zero motivation. So you'll have to poke me all day and annoy me (without actually annoying me) to do something. At times you might even have to force me to do something. But honestly, once I sit down and start working on whatever the project is (whether GD, video editing, sewing...) Don't expect me to get out of that chair for another 6 hours. My focus level can be intense once I get going.

I dislike watching your typical romantic movie. A lot of times, I'll protest it because ugh, cheesy. But I'd be quick to watch a romantic movie with a gay couple in it... My priorities~

Following Toh-chan's footsteps, I have a love for Greek Mythology. Mention it from across the room and I will fly next to you just to listen to your conversation/join in.

I love animals, but I can't have any pets like cats and dogs, because my dad is allergic and my mom is not too pleased by them haha ahhh

I have an inferiority complex. Which I honestly think stemmed from the 10 years of bullying I went through back in my old elementary/middle school. Some thing that were said and done, still effect me and still upset me thinking about it. Even though my bullying wasn't as terrible as others have endured. Bullying is bullying regardless.

I am a perfectionist. Even though I know I'm not perfect and there are a lot of things I definitely don't know how to do, I will stay working on something for days/weeks/etc on end if I don't think it's good enough (or just give up before even trying cause I know I can't do it) Sometimes I frustrate myself with my lack of being able to perfect something. It is one of the worst moods for me to drop into and also one of the moods that leads me to constantly being unmotivated.

Questions my poor soul has to answer~

1. What's your favorite show on television right now?
I barely watch tv as it is, so there aren't really many options for this one haha. But definitely, hands down, Glee!

2. Tell us about that guilty pleasure song/movie/series of yours.
Hmm guilty pleasure song would probably be SNSD - Oh. Because it is no secret that I'm not really a fan of those girls and I hate that song but I always catch myself going "Oh oh oh oh! Oh oh oh OH!" And it's nnottt okay.

3. Do you fashion your personal style after any particular inspirations?
Well I've always been a grab and go type person, but ever so slowly my style has started changing. I'm 100% blaming Glee and everything Kurt Hummel and Santana are~ My love for boots was already pretty intense... throw in Kurt's love and it's no bueno. Santana's love for strips apparently, Kurt's love for scarves and hats of every kind. Both 'Tana and Kurt's love for knee length sweaters/sweater dresses... Even Quinn's outfit choices are spectacular and needed...

Yeah I think it's safe to say they're ruining my life and my goal of remaining a tomboy forever haha

4. What is your dream job?
I'm not really that picky but I would love to be a singer. Whether or not it's background or etc, as long as I'm singing or performing/dancing. Then I think I'll be content~

5. Name two countries that you want to travel to.
Japan is definitely numero uno. I don't really have a second choice...but whatever country has beautiful scenery, than I'm all for it~

6. Do you have a dream cosplay, or have you made it already?

Cheza is one of my dream cosplays (And I'm attempting to make her this year, so let's see how that goes~)
Anthy Himemiya (Rose Bride Dress) </i><- Happened!
Sailor Mars (Sera Myu Version) - Because those Sera Myu are intense and would take my whole bank account and thensome on just trimming. But I do want to cosplay it one day.
Sailor Star Healer - *This* close to being her. My friend has my outfit~
Eternal Sailor Mars- The eternal outfits are simply positively gorgeous. Tedious work but I think it'll be worth it in the end.
Subaru Sumeragi - I love his character so much, it's not even funny. Since the first day I read Tokyo Babylon, I really wanted to be him... Also attempting that make that work this year~ May 2012 be the year of cosplay dreams!

7. What form of media could you absolutely not live without?
My internet. I would cry if I lost my internet. Everything else doesn't matter.

8. What's your favorite ice cream?
Anything with caramel in it, I will gladly eat. Although it would have to go to Dulce de Leche. You can win me over in life with that one~

9. Show us something that you wish you could have right now!
... My internet is running slow right now so I can't load google... but a massage. Badlyy.

10. How do you typically carry your personal items outside of school? Purse, backpack, messenger bag?
*Implying that I am currently in school* But usually more times than not, it would be a messenger bag or a Nike bag, because I live off of those things. My life isn't complete without one in my life~


Questions for you people (Since you are cosplayers, half will be cosplay related~)

Tagging all of you lovely people/even though probably won't do it~


1) Favorite cosplay that you have done so far?
2) Stealing Tawny's question here: Your dream cosplay?
3) Most expensive cosplay to date? (r.i.p Wallet and Bank Account)
4) Absolutely favorite convention to go to?
5) Favorite masquerade skit? (Masquerade Megan...so you can't count any of your CMV's or anything. No matter how awesome. I love you~)
6) Cosplay you're currently working on/planning on debuting next?
7) (Non-cosplay related) If you could play any instrument, what would it be? Or can you already play one?
8) (Non-cosplay related) Best memory of all of 2011?
9) (Non-cosplay related) Any spectacular plans for 2012?
10) (Non-cosplay related) Free for all (a.k.a. Channeling twitter and facebook haha) What's on your mind right now?

And I honestly feel like crying. My heart is breaking as Utena is one of my all time favorite shows and can never be replaced. And she did such an amazing job as Utena. Honestly she was perfection...

And I just know that every single time I watch an episode or the movie or listen to the soundtrack I'm going to feel sad and upset.

It's like finding out that Shiho Niiyama, Seiya Kou/Sailor Star Fighter's Voice Actor Died all over again... (and even though it's irrelevant that the day that she died- Feb 7th, was the day before her character's friend's birthday - Yaten's Feb 8th. Fictional or not for some reason that made it even more depressing)

I was so heartbroken that every time I heard her sing on the OST or watched Stars - my favorite season so I watched it A LOT- I would think "Her Seiyuu is AMAZING" But then I would have to pause and realize that it's no longer "is" but "was"

And that's just upsetting.

I think it's going to be a while before I can safely re-watch Utena without feeling like crying.

But until then, I'll keep showing my appreciation for the woman that brought a beloved character to life, in the only way I know how.

RIP Tomoko Kawakami

My condolences to her family and friends and her fans.

You will be missed ♥





"isagiyoku kakkoyoku ikite-yukou
    (Just a long long time)
tatoe futari hanarebanare ni natte mo
    (Let go of me)
Take my revolution"


"Take my revolution.   Let's go on with our lives.
Reality approaches now, frantically.
What I want is to find my place in life and my self-worth,
taking who I've been up until today... "


sagiyoku nugisuteru hadaka ni naru
jiyuu wo mau bara no   you ni
tatoe futari hanarebanare ni natte mo
watashi wa   sekai wo kaeru

私はいる～

It's rare that I update my journal here on dA *since all of my life and fangirl flailing/ramblings happen over on livejournal: aisurucheza.livejournal.com*&n… I feel the need to flaunt this everywhere if possible.

Sean Carey a.k.a S. Carey

If you have not heard of him or anything by him.

Take a pause out of your day and listen to his work. It's amazing

www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZsThBv…


That's really all I wanted to post here today...
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But I guess in other news since I'm actually typing here:


AnimeBoston is a no go for me, for multiple reasons. I apologize.

Otakon however is still on my to do list. (So if you're going to AB and I'm going to miss you, sorry D: But If you're going to Otakon instead, than Yay! I'll see you then!)

Sakura Matsuri still a go! Although I'm not sure what my cosplay plans are. Most likely Sailor Moon-ing it up with eviljenius2505

And GLEE CONCERT is a Go! Yes that makes me a full fledge Gleek and Dork but you know what, so be it. No shame to my game I will be having fun haha


"I don't quite know, how to say... how I feel
Those three words are said too much
They're not enough

If I lay here. If I just lay here...
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

Forget what we're told, Before we get too old.
Show me a garden that's bursting into life"
~Chasing Cars - Snow Patrol~